Brb, Gagging

Today was weird and lame and boring and I was feeling restless and rebellious and teenager-y so tonight I did the really immature and yet really necessary thing of sneaking some of my parent’s alcohol for my own personal enjoyment. And guess what, it was freaking disgusting; 0 out of 10, would not recommend.

No but seriously it tasted like shit. I didn’t know it was going to be that bad.

Now, I’m not really a drinker. Until recently, I thought I’d never drink just because the thought of it didn’t appeal to me. I had a sip of some wine like all kids probably do when they’re little and I thought it was grody. It smelled bad and tasted worse. Plus, my parents aren’t huge drinkers – my dad doesn’t drink at all and my mom drinks rarely and hardly ever in front of me or my brother. I didn’t grow up where alcohol was like a thing that was normal so I never pictured it as part of my life or something I’d do when I was older. I didn’t party in high school and I’ve been to a few parties since being in college, but honestly the whole atmosphere is a turn off for me. I mean, I always have fun with my friends, but being one of the only completely sober people it’s really obvious that parties are much more fun when you’re drunk. And being drunk and not in complete control of myself never appealed to me before. Like at all. Hello, designated driver! Not to mention, I’m still underage and I’m normally a disgustingly big, fat goody two-shoes so I figured that since I wasn’t too stoked on the drinking idea anyways, I’d have no problem waiting til I was 21 to wait and see how I felt about it then.

But then recently I’ve had the overwhelming urge to see what I’m missing out on. What the hell, I’m young. I’m allowed to be stupid and party and drink and have fun. I didn’t think I was giving it enough of a chance. I had all these stigmas and judgments and crap that were probably in the way of me actually trying it. Who knows? Maybe I’d actually like it. Maybe it’s actually not as disgusting as I thought when I was eleven or twelve.

Nope, I was wrong; definitely still as disgusting. My optimism failed me. Like honestly I almost spit, had to eat tons of food between sips just to get the taste out of my mouth, and couldn’t even finish the tiny bit I poured for myself. I mean I know it sounds lame but who cares, I hated it. I mean, I’m seeing the appeal of alcohol more and more as I get older and want to let loose and have fun. But if it tastes like shit, is it really worth it?

I’m guessing that other alcoholic beverages are better. The only thing my parents had open was like some bubbly white wine thing. Ugh, it was terrible. Maybe it was juvenile to steal some of my parents wine but the experience has made my evening more interesting, livened my spirits a little bit (ha ha spirits – see what I did there?? Ha I’m lame ok bye), and made me realize I’m not totally opposed to drinking. Maybe I just have to find the right drink. Or maybe drinking’s not for me at all. And whatever is the case is cool. We’ll just have to see.

In the meantime, I’ll be stuffing my face with chocolate ice cream to get these god-awful crap taste out of my mouth.

– Jade Alexandra

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